By hand

Thanks for the posts I’ve received so far. (At the last Equinox in ‘An invitation to write’I suggested we write in response to the words Equal and Angle.) l will leave your wonderful responses in the wings (ready to be approved comments in WordPress) a little bit longer.

You beautiful writers! You surprise me every time not with your abilities ( because I know you’ve got those) but with your generosity. You  always push me way out there to some new space with  your words. We are so often in awe of each other.

Those of you who know me a little through social media or otherwise may have guessed I’m not physically where I usually am. ( What a strange shape that sentence has, but I quite like its oddness.) I’ve suddenly found extemporising or playing with the words Equal and Angle to be a bit difficult, something I would normally find easy. I have  actually been scared of doing it. Good lesson, Sarah. The simple can become difficult, and the difficult simple. Remember that second one, don’t dwell on the first.

Don’t forget your physical surroundings and habits when asking yourself to be creative. The comfy dozy bed and notebook and pencil, the favourite cafe, the piece of paper on the kitchen table, the trusty computer screen, can all be triggers to making it easier.
They can be big props and reminders that you have written in the past and will in the future and maybe even be able to write now. Also try not to be hard on yourself. So self talk here ) stop it Sarah, it’s ok. It’s OK. You don’t have your usual things to remind you that you can write. Remember those students who have hidden that they can’t do this free association thing on call, but then did it later? It is OK. We learn together and we learn from each other. So here goes.

Equal

equal equal the qwa in my mouth a purse a birdcall I’ve been stuck on equality that difficult concept it’s aspiration it’s holy truth so I return to the sound and remember that this is a different word for a while just a sound I’m talking you round equal equal quill quill sugar free coffee but chemical sweet inside and outside night and day a place where they are equal a time where they are equal give me equal time equal respect equal pay equal work equal space in this place let us all have this don’t look down on me with ice eyes let your thoughts be heard don’t do this to me alone so no one sees and no one believes I remember again oh how could I forget I’m not equal because you can hurt me and you will because you like it and how did this come to be. stop. equal equal your hand clamps my arm and my blood stops pumping because love and hate are equal the same no equal not equal? Should be peaceful and this is not husbands or lovers or children but … people, I don’t know how those that  hurt try to hurt them more because?

Sorry guys. That was what was there.

Angle
Oh a funny one a bit off centre where am I looking I wish I hadn’t started this this way angle angle angels mis spellings spelling tests wanting a full score a right angle a triangulation it’s the canny way to triangulate to obfuscate to strategic ate my elbow my arse anglearium. I wanna atrium. Angle in my brain brain coral. Why do angle eyes appear Mary Queen of Scots.

This was all darker than expected, and I can assure you I’m in a good place at the moment.

And I look back and I think mmmm maybe I could write a story about an Anglearium that needs an atrium, main character – a designer or someone who is just brought in to think about what is possible a developer of sorts – it could be about equality in so many aspects – sounding sci fi – I’m feeling attracted to sci fi at the moment – but never really written it – just a tiny bit – oh I’ve got myself in a mess of trouble how can I possibly write this. Well – I’ll start and guess what? I have already.